The Dichotomy of Control is a foundational concept in Stoic philosophy. It teaches us to distinguish between what is within our control and what is not, allowing us to focus our energy where it can be most effective while accepting what we cannot change. This worksheet will help you apply this powerful principle to various aspects of your life, reducing unnecessary suffering and increasing your sense of agency and tranquility.

Print this worksheet or complete it digitally.

Part 1: Understanding the Dichotomy of Control

According to Epictetus, things in our lives fall into two categories:

Within our control:

  • Our judgments and opinions
  • Our desires and aversions
  • Our intentions and choices
  • Our own actions and responses

Not within our control:

  • Other people's actions and opinions
  • External events and circumstances
  • Our reputation and how others perceive us
  • Our body and health conditions (though we can influence them)
  • The ultimate outcomes of our efforts

Part 2: Analyzing Your Current Concerns

List your current significant concerns, challenges, or sources of distress:

Part 3: Applying the Dichotomy of Control

For each concern listed above, break it down into elements that are within your control and those that are not:

Concern 1:

Aspects within my control:

Aspects not within my control:

Where I've been focusing my energy:

Concern 2:

Aspects within my control:

Aspects not within my control:

Where I've been focusing my energy:

Concern 3:

Aspects within my control:

Aspects not within my control:

Where I've been focusing my energy:

Concern 4:

Aspects within my control:

Aspects not within my control:

Where I've been focusing my energy:

Part 4: Redirecting Your Focus

For each concern, develop a plan to redirect your energy toward what you can control:

Concern 1:

Specific actions I can take (focus on what's within your control):

How I will practice acceptance of what I cannot control:

Concern 2:

Specific actions I can take (focus on what's within your control):

How I will practice acceptance of what I cannot control:

Concern 3:

Specific actions I can take (focus on what's within your control):

How I will practice acceptance of what I cannot control:

Concern 4:

Specific actions I can take (focus on what's within your control):

How I will practice acceptance of what I cannot control:

Part 5: Reframing Your Thoughts

For each concern, practice reframing your thoughts to align with the Dichotomy of Control:

Concern 1:

Current thought pattern:

Reframed thought (focusing on what you can control):

Concern 2:

Current thought pattern:

Reframed thought (focusing on what you can control):

Concern 3:

Current thought pattern:

Reframed thought (focusing on what you can control):

Concern 4:

Current thought pattern:

Reframed thought (focusing on what you can control):

Part 6: Daily Dichotomy of Control Practice

Morning Reflection

Start each day by asking yourself these questions:

1. What matters to me today that is within my control?

2. What matters to me today that is not within my control?

3. How will I focus my energy on what I can control?

4. How will I practice acceptance of what I cannot control?

Evening Review

End each day by reflecting on these questions:

1. How well did I focus on what was within my control today?

2. When did I waste energy on things beyond my control?

3. What did I learn about applying the Dichotomy of Control today?

4. How will I apply this learning tomorrow?

Part 7: Challenging Scenarios Practice

Apply the Dichotomy of Control to these common challenging scenarios (or substitute your own):

Scenario 1: Receiving criticism at work/school

Within my control:

  • How I interpret the criticism
  • Whether I look for valuable feedback
  • How I respond to the person
  • What actions I take to improve

Not within my control:

  • Whether someone criticizes me
  • The manner in which criticism is delivered
  • Others' opinions of my work
  • Whether my improvements are recognized

My plan for focusing on what I can control:

Scenario 2: A close relationship experiencing conflict

Within my control:

  • My words and actions
  • My willingness to listen
  • My efforts to understand
  • My honesty and integrity

Not within my control:

  • The other person's reactions
  • Whether they choose to engage
  • Their willingness to compromise
  • The ultimate outcome of the conflict

My plan for focusing on what I can control:

Scenario 3: Working toward an important goal

Within my control:

  • My effort and preparation
  • My consistency and discipline
  • My response to setbacks
  • My willingness to learn and adapt

Not within my control:

  • External obstacles that arise
  • Others' support or opposition
  • Timing of results
  • Ultimate achievement of the exact outcome

My plan for focusing on what I can control:

Scenario 4: Dealing with a health concern

Within my control:

  • Following medical advice
  • Lifestyle choices (diet, exercise, sleep)
  • My attitude toward the situation
  • Seeking appropriate support

Not within my control:

  • The diagnosis itself
  • How quickly my body responds
  • Limitations imposed by the condition
  • Others' understanding of my experience

My plan for focusing on what I can control:

Part 8: Creating Dichotomy of Control Reminders

Develop personal reminders to help you apply this principle throughout your day:

Visual Reminders

What objects, images, or notes could you place in your environment to remind you of the Dichotomy of Control?

Verbal Mantras

Create 2-3 short phrases you can repeat to yourself when facing challenges:

Trigger Situations

Identify 3 recurring situations where you tend to focus on what you cannot control:

For each trigger situation, create a specific plan to redirect your focus:

Part 9: Tracking Your Progress

Use this section to track your application of the Dichotomy of Control over time:

Date Situation What I Could Control What I Couldn't Control How I Responded What I Learned

Part 10: Reflection on Growth

After practicing with this worksheet for at least two weeks, reflect on your experience:

How has applying the Dichotomy of Control affected your:

Stress levels:

Decision-making:

Relationships:

Sense of agency:

Peace of mind:

What has been most challenging about applying this principle?

What has been most rewarding about applying this principle?

Remember:

  • The goal is progress, not perfection
  • This practice becomes more natural with consistent application
  • The Dichotomy of Control is a tool for living, not a rigid dogma
  • Even Stoic philosophers struggled with this principle at times
  • The reward is increased tranquility and effectiveness, not control over the world
"Make the best use of what is in your power, and take the rest as it happens." — Epictetus

Print this worksheet for your personal use.

Related Resources: